Now that I am in the single world again, I have realized that I have a tremendous amount of free time. A lot of free time. I never really realized how much of my time was taken up in my last relationship. Not that that is a bad thing, per se. I now have pretty much unlimited free time on my hands, and I am really not sure how to best use it.
Learn to speak Spanish?
Learn about a particular subject?
Get involved in a bunch of things?
It's pretty funny, because my brother, who is married with a 2 year old and a 6 week old, has zero free time. Nada.
And I have more than I know what to do with. And I'm working my arse off too.
I've been getting this nagging feeling that I'm wasting time/my life. Maybe it's a natural process that everybody goes through. Come to think of it, it is natural. I've been pondering a lot, since I have plenty of "pondering time" on my hands - things like, "Why am I here?" and "What exactly is my purpose?" You know, the usual pontificating.
I'm not coming up with a lot...
I guess that I'm just a bit disappointed that my life hasn't gone differently. When I was 20, heck even 25, I thought that by the time I was 30, I'd be married with a house with a white picket fence, and 2.14 kids in said house.
I am very thankful that I do have what I do have though. And I do have a lot of fun, vicariously as it may be, with my brothers kids. As an aside, is it weird that I want to spend my Saturday night with those kids?
And the answer to that is...yes.
Now I really feel lame...it's not cool to want to hang with a 2 year old and discuss the hidden symbolism of an episode of "Barney" on a Saturday night, now is it?
Great, now I am making myself depressed. Oh, the humanity.
Have a great weekend. I know that I will. Keep on keepin' on.
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