It's kind of interesting being the oldest sibling and having never been married. I'm 32, my sister is 30 (she got married at 22, and divorced at 28ish), and my brother is 26 and got married this last September. The reason that I bring this up is that my parents, especially my mom, take a little extra care of me. I really think that it's because I don't have an "old lady" to do it for me.
I'm not talking about cleaning my house, or even doing my laundry. Here is what I mean.
About a week ago, I asked my mom if she would help me arrange the furniture and give me her input on the decorating. She loves that kind of stuff, and she's pretty good at it. I am pretty good at it too, but I really didn't have a good idea on how to get the ball rolling on this place.
So, yesterday, my parents came over and helped me get my Pimpin' Bachelor Pad O' Love (PBPOL) ready for the ladies. Actually on more than one occasion yesterday my mom uttered these words, "Well, we have to make this place look nice for any girls you bring over here." I'm being 100% serious. Aww Mom.
So we spent about 7 hours on my PBPOL, with a 1/2 hour break in there for dinner - I made a 100% homemade chicken soup, that was divine, by the way. As an aside, I'm becoming quite the cook. But I digress.
Now my PBPOL is about 95% finished, and it looks great. I am very grateful that my parents - well, mainly my mom - for helping me. It's funny and maybe a bit lame, but I really enjoy hangin' out with my parents. They crack me up, and I'm very thankful that we have a great relationship.
I also realize that it's a bit different because I'm single, as apposed to if I was married - which is definitely a good thing.
On a different note, I have kind of lost track of my dating "score" but I'll do my best to update the stats. So for those of you keeping score at home, and I hope that you are doing a better job of this than I am, here are the updated stats:
Match.com chicks: 0.5 for 4.5
"Real world" chicks: 0 for 3.5
Now let me explain the numbers. The 0.5 of the 4.5 under the Match.com category represents a girl that I talked to multiple times, but never actually met because she lives in Austin and she stopped responding to my calls (I only called twice and then gave up, so I'm not a stalker). The 0.5 of the 3.5 under the "Real World" chicks represents a girl the Lil N introduced me to, and she really blew me off on our 4th date (I believe that I wrote about that date earlier on this here blog) but now she is still wanting to maintain contact. I'm not really sure why, so I leave it as a 1/2 of a loss.
Well they say that dating is a numbers game, and boy howdy, do I have the numbers to prove it. Good grief. Dating is such a pain in the butt. But if I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, "Pimpin' ain't easy."
The 0.5 on the "win" side under the Match.com chicks represents a very real possibility in a girl. We met for the first time this Thursday and we had a great time. In fact, I'm more excited about her than any of the other chicks that I've been out with on this latest dating charade. She is very intriguing and I think that there is a lot of potential there. I'm keeping my fingers crossed with this one.
The beat goes on. And the search continues.
Until next time, keep on keepin' on.
Saturday, June 07, 2008
Monday, June 02, 2008
Dear John
I got another "Dear John" email today. I'm been getting quite a few of these suckers lately. It's not exactly earth shattering though. These emails are from girls that I've been on 1-3 dates with. Here is the story of the last one, with the actual email to follow. But first, the backstory.
I am a Christian. Shocking, I know. This girl, N, is also a Christian, but of the Church of Christ. I am not really familiar with that church, but I am more educated now. I first met N about 2 weeks ago, when we met for coffee. It went fine. We went out on our second date this past Friday, and it was interesting.
We went to a restaurant, where that wait was going to be about 45 minutes. I asked her if she wanted a drink, and she told me that she didn't drink, which didn't surprise me at all. She had given me some clues previously that had lead me to think that she was not a drinker. Which is fine with me, as long as she wouldn't get on my case if I did. So I ordered a beer, and we chit chatted.
Sometime during the dinner conversation, we started talking about religion. And somehow Israel was brought up. I told her (warning: I'm about to get into a bit of theology here) that I believed that we as Christians (and as a country) should support Israel. I also stated how important the Jews are to God, and to Christians, and how the "end times" revolved around God bringing back the Jews to Him. I believe that from the time of Jesus' death up until "The End" of the world, God is spreading His message through the Church, and it's Christians. This time is for the Gentiles to know God.
She completely disagreed. She said that the Jews are no long really relevant, and that the Church is what matters now, and that the Church has "replaced" the Jews now*. I was flabbergasted.
Well, we finished the night off without a hitch, and I called her on Sunday. She didn't answer and I left a message. When I didn't hear back from her that night, I really suspected that I wasn't going to hear from her again. I was wrong.
This morning the following email was in my inbox from her:
I don't know about you, but I took this to be a bit rude. Whatcha think?
Keep on keepin' on. And sorry for the preachin'.
*This false doctrine is called Replacement Theology, and is completely incorrect, because there is no Biblical backing for it.
I am a Christian. Shocking, I know. This girl, N, is also a Christian, but of the Church of Christ. I am not really familiar with that church, but I am more educated now. I first met N about 2 weeks ago, when we met for coffee. It went fine. We went out on our second date this past Friday, and it was interesting.
We went to a restaurant, where that wait was going to be about 45 minutes. I asked her if she wanted a drink, and she told me that she didn't drink, which didn't surprise me at all. She had given me some clues previously that had lead me to think that she was not a drinker. Which is fine with me, as long as she wouldn't get on my case if I did. So I ordered a beer, and we chit chatted.
Sometime during the dinner conversation, we started talking about religion. And somehow Israel was brought up. I told her (warning: I'm about to get into a bit of theology here) that I believed that we as Christians (and as a country) should support Israel. I also stated how important the Jews are to God, and to Christians, and how the "end times" revolved around God bringing back the Jews to Him. I believe that from the time of Jesus' death up until "The End" of the world, God is spreading His message through the Church, and it's Christians. This time is for the Gentiles to know God.
She completely disagreed. She said that the Jews are no long really relevant, and that the Church is what matters now, and that the Church has "replaced" the Jews now*. I was flabbergasted.
Well, we finished the night off without a hitch, and I called her on Sunday. She didn't answer and I left a message. When I didn't hear back from her that night, I really suspected that I wasn't going to hear from her again. I was wrong.
This morning the following email was in my inbox from her:
Hey Double D,
Sorry I didnt call you back last night, I was out. I wanted to tell you that it is very important to me to find someone with similar religious beliefs to mine. Speaking to you Friday night at dinner, I think our beliefs are about as opposite as they can get. I don't think there is any way that it can possibly work out between us.
Thanks for dinner,
N
I don't know about you, but I took this to be a bit rude. Whatcha think?
Keep on keepin' on. And sorry for the preachin'.
*This false doctrine is called Replacement Theology, and is completely incorrect, because there is no Biblical backing for it.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Yes, I'm Still Alive
I apologize to my 1.327 readers out there for not posting in about 3 years, but I have been a tad busy with dealing with "The Flood" of my apartment at the end of last month. I decided use capital letters when writing about my flooding, because then it puts it into mythic proportions. Kind of like The Great Flood, but not all of the massive destruction of the entire planet and all of that. Here is what happened.
Last month, I went down to Houston to visit my sister. I was away from my apartment from 7:00 A.M. on Friday until 9:00 P.M. on Sunday. I was dog tired as I walked up to my apartment, and when I opened the door, my first thought was that I had been robbed, but I quickly realized the my apartment was flooded. All of my stuff was in complete chaos, as the maintenance dudes had put as much of my stuff off of the floor. It was a mess!!!
Thank God I had renters insurance!
By that Wednesday, a company had moved my stuff into an apartment around the corner from my old one. They packed up about 30% of my stuff into boxes, and the rest they pretty much just threw into random piles o' stuff. I managed to find a decent apartment that is closer to work, and that is of a much better quality to boot. I am very pleased that it's all starting to work itself out. I am still waiting on the guitar shop to finish determining how much damage was done to my 3 acoustic and 2 electric guitars, my fiddle, and my mandolin. What a mess.
I had movers move me into my new apartment, and I am very glad that I did. I only had to pay about $100 with tip, because I used umovefree.com. Not a bad deal I guess. The moving company had a deal that the move was "free" as long as you don't actually have any stuff to move. Odd, I know. It's kind of a bait-and-switch type of deal. Your "free" move limited you to 25 boxes and a limited amount of furniture. I had to pay $2/box over 25 boxes, $25 because I had a sleeper sofa, and $20 for them to move my guitar amps and PA system. But, I didn't have to spend an entire day, in 105 degree heat, moving my earthly possessions, so I still think that I ended up ahead in the game.
I did, however, find that my poolside apartment isn't all it's cracked up to be. The little rugrats are pretty dang loud, and I think that my weekends aren't gonna be to quiet for the next few months. Oh well, at least I have a great view of all of the hot chicks that go swimming...Oh wait...There aren't any. Why am I paying an extra $25/month for the privilege of being poolside? Oh yeah, because it was the only first floor apartment available. Bummer.
I hope all 1.327 of you out there are livin' large. And I must apologize to Big R's sister who said that my blog is too depressing. Hey, I had broken up with my last girlfriend. Cut a brotha some slack. I'm back. I'm black. And I'm...oh forget it.
Keep on keepin' on.
Last month, I went down to Houston to visit my sister. I was away from my apartment from 7:00 A.M. on Friday until 9:00 P.M. on Sunday. I was dog tired as I walked up to my apartment, and when I opened the door, my first thought was that I had been robbed, but I quickly realized the my apartment was flooded. All of my stuff was in complete chaos, as the maintenance dudes had put as much of my stuff off of the floor. It was a mess!!!
Thank God I had renters insurance!
By that Wednesday, a company had moved my stuff into an apartment around the corner from my old one. They packed up about 30% of my stuff into boxes, and the rest they pretty much just threw into random piles o' stuff. I managed to find a decent apartment that is closer to work, and that is of a much better quality to boot. I am very pleased that it's all starting to work itself out. I am still waiting on the guitar shop to finish determining how much damage was done to my 3 acoustic and 2 electric guitars, my fiddle, and my mandolin. What a mess.
I had movers move me into my new apartment, and I am very glad that I did. I only had to pay about $100 with tip, because I used umovefree.com. Not a bad deal I guess. The moving company had a deal that the move was "free" as long as you don't actually have any stuff to move. Odd, I know. It's kind of a bait-and-switch type of deal. Your "free" move limited you to 25 boxes and a limited amount of furniture. I had to pay $2/box over 25 boxes, $25 because I had a sleeper sofa, and $20 for them to move my guitar amps and PA system. But, I didn't have to spend an entire day, in 105 degree heat, moving my earthly possessions, so I still think that I ended up ahead in the game.
I did, however, find that my poolside apartment isn't all it's cracked up to be. The little rugrats are pretty dang loud, and I think that my weekends aren't gonna be to quiet for the next few months. Oh well, at least I have a great view of all of the hot chicks that go swimming...Oh wait...There aren't any. Why am I paying an extra $25/month for the privilege of being poolside? Oh yeah, because it was the only first floor apartment available. Bummer.
I hope all 1.327 of you out there are livin' large. And I must apologize to Big R's sister who said that my blog is too depressing. Hey, I had broken up with my last girlfriend. Cut a brotha some slack. I'm back. I'm black. And I'm...oh forget it.
Keep on keepin' on.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
More Match.com Stuff
You just can't make this stuff up. I really, really wish that I could. If my monkey brain could come up with this stuff routinely, then I'd be sipping cold beer on a beach every day for the rest of my life. Here is another chick's profile and my example #2 of brilliance in literature:
Under her introduction heading about herself and who she is looking for:
Is "40G" her bra size?!?!? If so, then I'm out done right there. Plain and simple. And if it took her 26 years to get an "azz," then I'm out. And what does "someone that I...don't mind being seen with in public." mean? Or that she needs "someone that I can wake up to" or that she needs a "ten by my side?" This is just funny.
She continues and describes her ethnicity:
And to finish off her stunning profile, under the heading "Last Read." Um...well...she left that blank. Seriously. She couldn't come up with anything that she last read?!?!? That's dang funny.
Keep on keepin' on.
Under her introduction heading about herself and who she is looking for:
I'm 5"4, 40G and thick in the waist. I can also say I even have an azz, it took me about 26 years to get it. I'm looking for someone who's down to earth and love to chill. I need someone that I can wake up to and don't mind being seen with in public. I need a ten by my side.
Is "40G" her bra size?!?!? If so, then I'm out done right there. Plain and simple. And if it took her 26 years to get an "azz," then I'm out. And what does "someone that I...don't mind being seen with in public." mean? Or that she needs "someone that I can wake up to" or that she needs a "ten by my side?" This is just funny.
She continues and describes her ethnicity:
"Dark & Lovely"
And to finish off her stunning profile, under the heading "Last Read." Um...well...she left that blank. Seriously. She couldn't come up with anything that she last read?!?!? That's dang funny.
Keep on keepin' on.
Match.com stuff
I have been on match.com off an on for the past 5 years or so, and I've met some pretty interesting women. I've also seen some pretty dang crazy profiles too. Here is an example of one woman's paragraph to describe herself and what she wants in a man:
If that's not poetry, then I don't know what is.
Here is what she does for fun:
Oh, she "like action comedy movies." What exactly is that? It's cool that she "love been with friend" and "been close to the nature." Astounding.
Here's more. Here is what she wrote about her job:
What in the sam hell does that mean?!?!? I am so confused right now. So you always travel on your job, but what part of your job entails "when ever am on visiting"??!?!?!!?!?!?!!? I need to nap. But wait, there's more.
Here is what she wrote about her religion:
Good. At least she's a "church girl." I go to church "when ever am around" too. Wow, we must be soulmates!
It keeps going. Under her education, she wrote these stunningly brilliant words:
She really has a gift. Seriously. I couldn't make this stuff up.
And to finish off her Shakespearian-like prose, she wrote this under the heading of Favorite Hot Spots:
If she is able to tie her shoes and feed herself, I would be thoroughly impressed.
I feel like I've had my brain sucked out of my head, and watched it cooked like scrambled eggs after reading her profile.
I'm guessing that she's not picking up a lot of "educated men." Or any guy that would want to date her for longer than 5-6 sex-filled nights.
I'm gonna search for more of these beauties, and I'll post them if I find any more.
In the meantime, keep on keepin' on.
"I want a man who is not always thinking about themselves. One who is very romantic and not afraid to just go do something off the wall. Romance keeps a relationship going. I'm not one that just likes to go to bed have sex and then that is it. It needs to have the right mood."
If that's not poetry, then I don't know what is.
Here is what she does for fun:
"I love reading, listening to music, like action comedy movies, love meeting people far or near, i love been with friend and going out for camping and most of all been close to the nature."
Oh, she "like action comedy movies." What exactly is that? It's cool that she "love been with friend" and "been close to the nature." Astounding.
Here's more. Here is what she wrote about her job:
"I always travel ..when ever am on visiting."
What in the sam hell does that mean?!?!? I am so confused right now. So you always travel on your job, but what part of your job entails "when ever am on visiting"??!?!?!!?!?!?!!? I need to nap. But wait, there's more.
Here is what she wrote about her religion:
"I go to church when ever am around."
Good. At least she's a "church girl." I go to church "when ever am around" too. Wow, we must be soulmates!
It keeps going. Under her education, she wrote these stunningly brilliant words:
"I really miss my classmate."
She really has a gift. Seriously. I couldn't make this stuff up.
And to finish off her Shakespearian-like prose, she wrote this under the heading of Favorite Hot Spots:
"Well am new to the internet dating thing but will like to experience life with my partner.who knows..."
If she is able to tie her shoes and feed herself, I would be thoroughly impressed.
I feel like I've had my brain sucked out of my head, and watched it cooked like scrambled eggs after reading her profile.
I'm guessing that she's not picking up a lot of "educated men." Or any guy that would want to date her for longer than 5-6 sex-filled nights.
I'm gonna search for more of these beauties, and I'll post them if I find any more.
In the meantime, keep on keepin' on.
Check This Out
In case you didn't feel bad enough about Global Warming, here is a complete list of the consequences of Global Warming. Yes, even "fashion disasters" and "polar bear cannabillistic" are blamed on Global Warming. Good grief, when are people gonna wake up and see that this "Global Warming" stuff is a bunch of B.S.!!!
Keep on keepin' on.
Keep on keepin' on.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Nice Surprise For Me
I had a great weekend. I flew to Houston to visit my sister. But all of that joy was sucked from my soul when I stepped foot into my apartment.
It flooded.
Sometime after 7:00 A.M. this past Friday, my toilet decided to keep running...and running...and running, until my entire apartment was flooded. I have no idea when the surrounding neighbors noticed it, but most of my stuff was on my bed, kitchen table, couch, etc.
And now my place smells like a swamp.
I spent about 3 hours this evening going through the damaged goods. I'm pretty dang upset because my Willie Nelson autographed guitar is ruined. I had him sign my very first guitar, so there is also a big sentimental value to it too. All of my 5 guitars, a 50-60 year old violin, and a mandolin were damaged.
Not too fun.
I'm meeting with the insurance adjuster tomorrow morning. I just hope that I don't get completely screwed on the deal.
Keep on keepin on.
It flooded.
Sometime after 7:00 A.M. this past Friday, my toilet decided to keep running...and running...and running, until my entire apartment was flooded. I have no idea when the surrounding neighbors noticed it, but most of my stuff was on my bed, kitchen table, couch, etc.
And now my place smells like a swamp.
I spent about 3 hours this evening going through the damaged goods. I'm pretty dang upset because my Willie Nelson autographed guitar is ruined. I had him sign my very first guitar, so there is also a big sentimental value to it too. All of my 5 guitars, a 50-60 year old violin, and a mandolin were damaged.
Not too fun.
I'm meeting with the insurance adjuster tomorrow morning. I just hope that I don't get completely screwed on the deal.
Keep on keepin on.
Monday, April 14, 2008
A Few Comments
1. I hate the IRS. Nuff said.
2. Why on earth are we paying so much freaking $$$ in taxes, only to:
a) support well-bodied people who refuse to work?
b) pay for a vastly overbearing government
c) give it away to terrorist nations in "aid"
I could keep going, but I'll stop there.
3. I read this today from Dennis Prager
"I am convinced that human evil is so great that most people choose either to ignore it or to focus their concerns elsewhere -- like those who believe that human-created carbon dioxide emission, not human evil, poses the greatest threat to mankind. No one will ever get killed for fighting global warming. Fighting evil, on the other hand, is quite dangerous."
Sad but true. Keep on keepin' on.
2. Why on earth are we paying so much freaking $$$ in taxes, only to:
a) support well-bodied people who refuse to work?
b) pay for a vastly overbearing government
c) give it away to terrorist nations in "aid"
I could keep going, but I'll stop there.
3. I read this today from Dennis Prager
"I am convinced that human evil is so great that most people choose either to ignore it or to focus their concerns elsewhere -- like those who believe that human-created carbon dioxide emission, not human evil, poses the greatest threat to mankind. No one will ever get killed for fighting global warming. Fighting evil, on the other hand, is quite dangerous."
Sad but true. Keep on keepin' on.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Abraham Lincoln Quote
I found this quote, which was printed in an article about the US not producing many rare earth minerals anymore. I'm not gonna post that article, because it ain't exactly what this blog is about; but I did find that this quote is very, very valid for today's United States.
“It is the duty of nations, as well as of men, to own their dependence upon the overruling power of God … and to recognize the sublime truth, announced in the Holy Scriptures and proven by all history, that those nations only are blessed whose God is the Lord. … We have been the recipients of the choicest blessings of heaven. We have been preserved, these many years, in peace and prosperity. We have grown in numbers, wealth and power as no other nation ever has grown; but we have forgotten God. We have forgotten the gracious Hand which preserved us in peace, and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us; and we have vainly imagined, in the deceitfulness of our hearts, that these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own.” Abraham Lincoln.
That pretty much sums up, in my humble opinion, the US's problems today.
Keep on keepin' on.
“It is the duty of nations, as well as of men, to own their dependence upon the overruling power of God … and to recognize the sublime truth, announced in the Holy Scriptures and proven by all history, that those nations only are blessed whose God is the Lord. … We have been the recipients of the choicest blessings of heaven. We have been preserved, these many years, in peace and prosperity. We have grown in numbers, wealth and power as no other nation ever has grown; but we have forgotten God. We have forgotten the gracious Hand which preserved us in peace, and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us; and we have vainly imagined, in the deceitfulness of our hearts, that these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own.” Abraham Lincoln.
That pretty much sums up, in my humble opinion, the US's problems today.
Keep on keepin' on.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
An Update
I'll give you and update on my dating "score."
Match.com dates: 0-2
"Real World" dates (i.e., girls that I didn't meet through a computer): 0-3
I have been on anywhere from 1-4 dates with these women, and it's been interesting.
I have just started talking to a girl that my aunt introduced me to. Disadvantage: she's only 23. Advantage: she's 6' tall. (For those of you that don't know, I'm 6'3".) We talked for the first time last night and it went pretty well, and I'm planning on going out with her sometime next week. I have learned a while ago to have exactly zero expectations when going out on first dates. My hope before any given first date is about 5%. It makes it a lot easier that way.
One odd thing of late, I have seen 3 very attractive black women (1 from Texas, 1 from Kenya, and 1 from Nigeria) in the past 3 days at 2 of the clinics that I work. And they were all single. Hmm, maybe I should go back to black?
On a completely random note, I'm working in a clinic in Dallas today. The office manager here is very cool and we get along very well. She told me that there was a client that she thought that would be good for me to date. I told her great, because I'm up for dating pretty much anybody once. I'm not desperate, but I think that it's pretty easy to be too picky, and you never know who you will be attracted too.
Back to the story, I told the office manager to set it up. And then she said very loudly, "What are you gonna say to her? 'Hey Baby, you wanna take ride in my HUMMER?'" There was a client on the other side of the door, and since the doors are made of rice paper, the client heard her. Not exactly a professional thing to say when a client can hear.
Well, I'd better get back to "working." I really don't see too many patients at this clinic, which is kinda nice.
Keep on keepin' on.
Match.com dates: 0-2
"Real World" dates (i.e., girls that I didn't meet through a computer): 0-3
I have been on anywhere from 1-4 dates with these women, and it's been interesting.
I have just started talking to a girl that my aunt introduced me to. Disadvantage: she's only 23. Advantage: she's 6' tall. (For those of you that don't know, I'm 6'3".) We talked for the first time last night and it went pretty well, and I'm planning on going out with her sometime next week. I have learned a while ago to have exactly zero expectations when going out on first dates. My hope before any given first date is about 5%. It makes it a lot easier that way.
One odd thing of late, I have seen 3 very attractive black women (1 from Texas, 1 from Kenya, and 1 from Nigeria) in the past 3 days at 2 of the clinics that I work. And they were all single. Hmm, maybe I should go back to black?
On a completely random note, I'm working in a clinic in Dallas today. The office manager here is very cool and we get along very well. She told me that there was a client that she thought that would be good for me to date. I told her great, because I'm up for dating pretty much anybody once. I'm not desperate, but I think that it's pretty easy to be too picky, and you never know who you will be attracted too.
Back to the story, I told the office manager to set it up. And then she said very loudly, "What are you gonna say to her? 'Hey Baby, you wanna take ride in my HUMMER?'" There was a client on the other side of the door, and since the doors are made of rice paper, the client heard her. Not exactly a professional thing to say when a client can hear.
Well, I'd better get back to "working." I really don't see too many patients at this clinic, which is kinda nice.
Keep on keepin' on.
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