UNBEEEEEEEEELIEVABLE!!!!! I just had the most amazing experience this season with the Astros. I was fortunate enough to make it to all 5 of the home games this playoff season, and if you want to know what it sounded like to be in Minute Maid Park, think about standing next to a jet plane, then turn up the volume. Crazy. Hit this page for the 411 on the 'Stros.
For this playoff season, the same as last season, my friends and I hit up the Homeplate Bar & Grill. It's kinda like our version of Cheers, only the bartender there doesn't have a sweet mullet. But it's nice to have a place where, when the place is packed after a Astros game, the bartender slides you a Miller Lite without having to ask for it. I always enjoy the faces of the other cats that have been waiting for 15 minutes, when they realize that I got served before them. Hey, it pays to be a regular. And when you attend as many Astros games as I have, you deserve it.
After that glorious last out by Jason Lane (said in the way that only the Astros announcer can do), I gave my friend Cameltoes a call (the nickname isn't dirty, so get your head outta the gutter). Needless to say he was pretty excited, and thankfully, his coffee table managed to survive his celebration dance, which I can only imagine was performed in his boxers (dang you Cameltoes, now I have a sick image in my head). My liver, unfortunately, did not fair so well. I'm no "real doctor", but I don't think that slammin' bourbon and cokes and Miller Lite during the game does a body good. Oh sweet nector of the gods. Luckily, this morning's hangover was a mild one, as I didn't pay homage to the porcelain god. Yay!!! Baby steps, baby steps.
On the poker front, I started my initial bonus whoring recently on Interpoker, which has a $90 initial deposit bonus. They also have a monthly reload bonus, which I hope to take advantage of. At my current rate of attempting to clear the bonus, I will be $229.68 in the RED by the time I get through it. Nice huh? Gotta love bonus whoring. Of course that's just an average loss at my current rate, so variance can still kick me in the nads harder than that, if it feels so inclined. Oh the humanity.
I swear that I really am a winning player. Really. I started the year out nicely and going into July, I was ahead by a nice sum. But then something horrid happened. The laws of probability started taking effect. You know that you're a huge dog to hit your set, but hey I'll call that bet, and hit it. Doing that once is O.K., but over, and over, and over, and over, for weeks and weeks is really starting to get old. Kind of like, "Look kids, Big Ben, Parliament." I've managed to bring my profits down to about 1/3 or so in that amount of time. Judas Priest kids, do you have all kick me at once?
Someday the odds will smile on me again......someday. I guess it's kinda like the odds of the Astros making it to the World Series after being 15-30 at the start of the season. But it happened.
So kids, rest easy, strange things are happening now. "Dogs and cats, living together, mass hysteria". What will happen next?
We'll talk to ya later, so in the meantime, keep on keeping on.
P.S. Anyone have World Series tickets they want to sell me at face value?? I didn't think so.
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There is no way to outrun back luck/karma/variance/the plague/pissed off chihuahuas/ex-girlfriends. This afternoon I fired up Interpoker to try and grind away at the bonus. First the good news, I only have about 350 more raked hands left. Yeah!! The bad news is that I went down half a buy-in in about 30 minutes. Oh you dirty whore, with your promises of sweet goodness, only leaving me with a case of "it burns when I drain the lizzard". What is wrong with this. I'm not gonna bore you with any details, but these 2nd best hands are killing me.
Maybe I should sell semen instead. At least that gives you a steady paycheck, and a side benefit of spreading my seed without having to worry about the changing diapers thing. I can handle animal crap all day long, even going armpit deep into a mare's rectum is nothing, but human excriment is an entirely different animal (pun intended). But I digress.
I guess I'd better get to work or something; I have more chihuahuas to try to save whilst they attempt to take off my hand. Why did I choose this profession? Oh yeah the money.....wait, I'm not a "real doctor", so I make as much as a sanatation worker. Oh yeah, the love of animals. Preach on brotha.
Keep on keepin' on, because that's all you can do.
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